Notes: Dedicated to Lee, for supporting me in my fever for this pairing, even when she can’t keep up with the latest progresses.
None of the characters belong to me and all written below is pure fiction. Information on the actresses' schedules is also fictional.
Chapter 1
From Tsukishiro Kanato’s LINE Messenger
Mayu: Did you just kiss Arinko?
Mayu: What the
Mayu: Read your damn texts!
Mayu: Shit
Mayu: Whatever is going on, she’s not the one you want to fool around with
Mayu: Reiko!
Mayu: Where the hell did you go?
Mayu: Don’t go after her!
Mayu: READ THIS!
Mayu: Shit!
*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
Parties would always make me feel anxious. Nothing good could materialize from them that wouldn’t happen without. This one in special was built to make anyone in my position feel overwhelmed. With the reconstructions of the Takarazuka Hotel and how it tied to the Moon Troupe’s current musical, the higher-ups had decided it was a given that we should be present in one of the parties to attract more investors, and this one was a big Christmas party. For that, they’d invited some of the troupe members along with a number of the already graduated Takarasiennes. But the spotlight seemed to be, of course, on the Top Star and on me, the new nibanteyaku, the just-recovered girl after a long absence.
At least, the part in which I had to follow Tamaki Ryou, or Miki-san as we call her, on stage was over now. Theoretically, now we only had to enjoy the food and the drinks. Theoretically, I was in the safe. But my mind still relived every micro detail from the moment I’d arrived at the party until now. At a point, I had tripped and, although it hadn’t been but a hiccup-like misstep, who was to say no one had noticed? I looked around and people’s eyes were still on us. Whispering, commenting. If only I could just go home… My stomach was in the middle of a storm, my hands and face and neck were liquefying.
“I’m so glad we can meet again, Rurika-san!” I heard Miki-san say to Miya Rurika, her former nibante, who’d left the company some months before. Was it already half a year ago? July, August, September, October, November, December, oh wow. Entire six months had passed, and I never saw Rurika-san again ever since I had had to take the medical license for the remaining days of her farewell presentation. Great, now I was even more nervous. I should have said something warmer to her. I should say it now. This moment.
“Ah,” was all I managed to get out of my mouth. And my ears were deaf, I so had no idea about the intonation I’d used.
“And I’m ecstatic to see you back in your full form, Reiko-chan.”
I blushed, because I knew from those words Rurika-san had understood me, even when I had no idea what exactly I would have said. So I nodded with more strength than needed, making both my neck and the place my chin hit on my chest hurt. I was searching for the right words to add to the conversation when I felt someone pull me tight into a hug and my shoulder meet a soft pair of breasts. A sweet aroma of wine exhaled when they spoke in a faux-whisper with lips touching my hair, “You were so beautiful up there!”
Ari? This was certainly Akatsuki Chisei, Ari, one of my best friends for sure, but absolutely not to that point. I raised my head to verify and she was still so close we were a klutzy moment from kissing. I was about to pull away from what I could only call a drunk incident in the happening, when she enveloped me even more and winked. Huh?, I voicelessly mumbled back but went ignored.
“It’s so nice to see you again, Rurika-san! Right, Reiko?” As she spoke, Ari gave me just enough space to straighten my posture before she pulled me again, at least with less strength this time. Actually, she might have been caressing my arm concurrently.
And did she just call me Reiko? No honorifics?
As I tried to figure out just how many glasses she had had while we had been on stage—definitely not before, for the troupe members had been together the whole time without any alcohol in hands—, something else caught my eyes. Ari was still telling Rurika-san how we missed her sharp advices during the rehearsals and mentioning Miki-san by name, but the very Miki-san didn’t seem to take notice. Her attention focused on… me? Us? I looked again to my side; Ari still hadn’t made any attempt to break our embrace, and her hand circled my arm and shoulder gently, sometimes tickling the bare skin on my neck. That’s what Miki-san glared. I could feel the astonishment coming from her. This was uncomfortable, but Ari would tighten her grip at any attempt to escape.
“I can’t wait for you to come and watch our scene,” Ari continued talking as if she weren’t borderline harassing me. This time, she turned to me with a different smile, one that showed we had some secret, even though I had no idea what scene would be called ours. Didn’t her character end up with Odachin’s? “We talked a lot, the two of us” she motioned to me “and concluded there was no way something wasn’t going on between us.” She paused with a devilish smile. “The characters, of course,” she added in a mellower tone, turning her breath to my neck.
We never decided such a thing! But how could I just barge in the conversation and correct her? It’s not like Rurika-san cared. Miki-san did, though; her brows furrowed and her eyes wouldn’t leave Ari’s hand on me. Were I not a part, I’d also suspect Ari and I were a couple—not the characters!—, so I couldn’t blame her bafflement. Despite all that going on, Ari seemed oblivious even to Miki-san’s presence, continuing to describe the whole song I sang to her in the musical, or her detorted views of it.
That was when it hit me. This was nothing more than an act. Ari wasn’t actually drunk, she was pretending we were dating for Miki-san’s benefit. Why else would she ignore one of the people she most respected? Oh no, this could only mean what I’d always interpreted as respect toward her senior had actually been… a crush!
Oh no again, I’d been a terrible friend. Because maybe she had mentioned something. There had been this time I thought I had misheard her ramblings that she had dated a girl? During their time in the Music School? She never said a thing again, and it had slipped—maybe on purpose!—in the middle of an entirely different topic.
We’d also been discussing Grand Hotel once, and how Ari had thought people would care more about her character when she’d been the one who’d brought up how she’d been careful in portraying a woman in love with another. She’d also talked about that former takarasienne who’d married a woman in Disney. There had been so much more and just now was I putting the pieces together. For months my friend had been trying to come out to me, to enlist my help with Miki-san!
Yes, it had probably started around the time Rurika-san announced her retirement. We’d been devastated, especially Miki-san. I’d also been called to become the following nibanteyaku and felt so helpless watching Miki-san despair over that loss when I knew I couldn’t come close to fill those shoes. I even pleaded with Rurika-san not to go, as if she could have done anything…
This had happened a little bit before my injury. I’d been checking something with Rurika-san and once again I felt tears coming to my eyes. She’d just reassured me my being the nibante wouldn’t lead Takarazuka Revue to bankruptcy—I understand that doesn’t make sense when put so bluntly, since it was the product of many sleepless wonderings and a long explanation that would be too distracting to what matters here. But that’s how we were when Ari showed up. I quickly swallowed back my insecurities, especially because, by contract, I wasn’t to divulge my future promotion yet, and she’d already been suspicious for a while I knew something. Rurika-san went away, mostly to escape Ari, but I suspected it was to escape further whining on my part as well, leaving me to pretend everything was rose-colored.
I sighed.
“Reiko-san…” She studied me before continuing, her lips parted and her big eyes taking in each detail of my terrible poker face. “You don’t look well.” She smiled, probably forcing it to make me lower my guard. “Just tell me if there’s anything I can do.” At the time, I’d thought she was just fishing for the nibanteyaku news. “You have to know I won’t ever judge you, right?” She waited for my response with a terrifying stare of eagerness. “People have been through it before, and life goes on. Rurika-san will still be there, even if it’ll be harder for… something more… you know.” She raised her eyebrows but frowned. “For other parts, however, it’ll even make things easier, believe me.”
Because I really couldn’t talk about it without leaking that information, I just thanked Ari, adding, “I know I can count on you.” I smiled back, wondering if it was silly to think I’d be served for ranting with my co-worker.
However, Ari was so young; if I were to risk that suit indeed, it would have to be with someone who’d really be able to advise me. As I thought that, Ari gave me a tight hug that almost changed my mind. “Miki-san will be so much busier now,” she added, with what I’d interpreted as more fishing on her part. But that had possibly been her point since the beginning. “In any case,” she said, “count on me, that I’ll help you with however I can.”
“Thank you,” I repeated, but held my ground. Ari herself had reminded me of how she couldn’t help enough.
That was one of our misunderstandings. I’d thought she just wanted to hear the newest gossip, even if I’m sure she’d also meant it when she said she’d support me. Now, as the actual nibante, I have that proof of how hard she’s been working to be there for me, just like she’d promised that day. Nonetheless, her mind had been on something else entirely; and I’d been such a bad friend…
With my mind back at the party, I looked once more at Ari, still doing her best to show Miki-san that she and I were a couple. Okay, time for me to be a good friend and at least stop getting in the way of her plan. Discretely, I took a step closer to her and put my hand around her waist. My heart was beating fast, wondering the repercussions of the wrong person seeing this, so I made sure Miki-san was the only one watching besides Rurika-san and gave Ari a quick peck on the cheek. I heard her stutter at this and took it just like a medal when a blush tinted her complexion. She’d been the one to provoke this and never considered I could cooperate?
How much further could this go, though? This was my first time improvising such a fib in real life, and it had been a while since my last actual relationship. It didn’t help that they had all been secret and I’m certainly not the type who enjoys these public displays. So we needed a final blow to end this conversation, of which I hadn’t heard more than a fraction. There had to be something we could do, it couldn’t be that our PDA had already peaked… I risked another glance at Miki-san and was satisfied that she herself didn’t look satisfied at all. Still, it wouldn’t last and soon the whole façade would be shrugged as the effects of the alcohol. I had to help Ari.
Half of this was exciting, but even that quickly transformed into frustration, and I had to deal with my lack of creativity.
“We were out the other day, the two of us,” Ari was saying when I looked at her, admiring how she could still keep going. “And Reiko’s mom mentioned this place, so I can’t wait for our break. I hope she’ll be free to come with us, Reiko’s mom.” Yeah, this girl knew how to lie, because I had no idea what that could mean. “You keep forgetting to ask her.” Ari turned to me with a snicker. “Reiko still isn’t comfortable if I call Mother directly.” I wouldn’t be indeed, because I didn’t remember Ari even having my mother’s contact. Or calling her Mother. She didn’t have her number, right? “See?” Ari laughed more loudly. “This is the look on her face every time I threaten to just ring her myself. I considered messaging her, but it’s the sort of thing we should do the old way, to be respectful. Plus, I want to make sure she knows she won’t be in our way or anything.”
This story… was too weird. But I had to do my best not to show.
“Reiko, stop looking like I’m asking for your hand!” She laughed again.
“You got very close these last months,” Rurika-san said, tightening her lips. I would have to apologize the moment Miki-san left. Rurika-san had been almost a mentor to me ever since my transfer to the Moon Troupe, so this felt dirty.
Ari nodded without hesitation, though. “Finally!”
“That’s unexpected, considering everything.”
Everything what? Rurika-san did know I’m bisexual; I remember us talking about our ex-girlfriends and how hard it had been to even find anyone who’d understand the way we lived and even harder to keep them. The two of us hadn’t dated anyone in years, that I knew of, although she still had flings here and there. Closer to her retirement, she confided she wished she had taken a leap of faith, but she wasn’t sure the other party would. I never had it in me to ask whom she’d meant, because it’d sounded like someone from the theater. In any case, all that to say she had no reason to call us unexpected, especially if Ari’s hints were right and she were also queer. And they were right, or why else would we be risking unemployment flirting in the middle of a company party? Hm, it was weird that someone as outgoing as Ari would be in the closet… Like, look at us hugging in front of the world! This was the real Ari, so why had she never told me about it? Had I seemed unwelcoming? Prejudiced? Come to think of it, I easily called her my best friend, but we’d never discussed her love life. Or mine; but what would there be for me to say about what had been in a coma forever?
“I’m feeling tipsy, Rei-chan,” Ari’s voice brought me back. She was already resting her head on my shoulder and sort of tapping? Or beating it? As though to make it softer. “Let’s get out of here?”
We couldn’t really leave. Not until the party was over. Though Ari might get away with bailing, I wouldn’t dare try. And yet, she had hugged my arm and was all but humping it, insisting we leave. “C’mon, I can’t wait to get into bed…” She hadn’t really needed to use that intonation for a misunderstanding (could we still call it so, when that was the aim?), but she was still all out. The arm she held was once more brushing her breasts, making my face burn. We’re women and I was no virgin. Especially in our line of work, that wasn’t supposed to be an alien feeling. Really, how different was this from acting on a stage? However…
I could also do this! I took a deep breath and forced myself to pretend Miki-san wasn’t there, or she’d read my uneasiness all over my face. Time for the final blow.
“You know I can’t.” I laughed nervously. It had been on purpose but that edginess was real. “Why don’t you go ahead, Aachan? Take a long bath,” I let my eyes linger around her body, “and keep that bed warm and smelling like that lotion I love? I’ll be right there, I promise.”
Ari didn’t miss a beat and nodded with her mouth slightly open. I wasn’t sure if Miki-san could really catch this part, but she licked her lower lip so slowly, I felt hypnotized. Then, she broke away from raping my arm. That lick, though, was surely the sexiest part of her show, and I couldn’t believe she had failed to notice she had been facing away from her most important audience member, Miki-san. Still, Rurika-san’s raised eyebrow proved I hadn’t just imagined that intensity. For the first time, I felt jealous that Miki-san could one day soon have the real thing all to herself.
When I recovered, Ari was already stepping away.
“I’m not done yet,” I said as calmly as I could, but I tried to make sure to input huskiness to my voice. After that, I caressed the side of her hair, closing our distance. This time, I made sure we had the right angle for Miki-san to see this but no one else really distinguish what they saw, in case somebody happened to look our way. This time, my practice as a Takarasienne would help me the opposite way I’d always used this technique for.
I kissed her mouth. That was predictable, considering the occasion. That’s why Ari deserved more, and I’d serve today’s special. So I quickly bared my tongue by the end. Of course, I hadn’t forced it inside Ari’s mouth, only our lips had touched, though I felt she had quickly recovered from the surprise and tried to prolong the kiss. Still, we had crossed too many limits in our friendship to gross her out with my saliva. The tongue was but an optical illusion for Miki-san alone. This thought made me blush, although Ari didn’t seem aware as she walked away.
My phone vibrated in my pocket.
“I’ll go see her off and be right back,” I announced to our two VIP audience members and hurried the same path Ari had taken.
That was amazing! Rurika-san had no idea what hit her, believe me! had read her message, followed by winking faces and other emoticons I didn’t have time to translate. They surely looked dirty.
While I tried to find Ari outside the salon of the party, the phone wouldn’t stop vibrating in my hand. But the sender wasn’t her; they were mostly from Mayu, my douki Kizuki Yuuma. I hadn’t been able to actually read them, but I could imagine they weren’t very gentle, since Mayu was in a very good position to at least find my closeness to Ari weird. Did she think I was taking advantage of someone drunk? I’d deal with it as soon as I—
“There you are!” I’d found Ari in front of the elevator.
“Isn’t it better if we talk tomorrow? Or just video call me when you’re home! I’ve got some great ideas to help you, Reiko-san!” Inexplicably, I winced at the honorific she’d always used with me. It felt out of place when her the phantom of her touch lingered all over my arm.
“No, wait. Help me? Why did you text about Rurika-san? What about Miki-san?”
Ari tilted her head. “What about her?”
“She was the one you wanted to make jealous, no? Isn’t Rurika-san a little too old for you, Ari?”
She looked taken aback but then seemed to understand and broke out in laughter. “I have no intention of competing with you. What twisted thing were you thinking back there?”
It was time for me to tilt my head. “You weren’t trying to make Miki-san jealous? Or Rurika-san?” I added quickly.
“Rurika-san of course! But I was just helping you, not competing or whatever you concluded.”
“Helping me do…” I waited for her to complete, but she was making a face of an owner waiting for their dog to finish its newly learned trick. Oh, damn. “You thought I wanted to make Rurika-san jealous? What for?” My voice could hit the ceiling if it went any higher.
Ari shrugged. That cheeky kakyuusei had just given up on me?
Oh yeah… She hadn’t been trying to come out to me before. She was trying to make me come out. “I’m not in love with Rurika-san.” The best way was to be blunt after using up our entire misunderstandings quota for the year. “I’ve never been, and I don’t think I will be in love with her.”
“No way. C’mon, Reiko-san! Think well, you get all girly and giddy around her. You were so sad during her Sayonara Show too, you managed to cry more than Miki-san. That wasn’t supposed to be possible.”
“You also cried! Everyone cried, it was a taidan!”
“Think again. Today you were all lit up talking to her,” she continued.
“I was meeting an important friend after a long time.”
She had the follow-up ready: “Friend being the word we want to change.”
“Ari…”
“There you are! What hell, Reiko!”
I looked behind me to find Mayu coming our way fuming.
“Uh oh,” Ari said, pressing the elevator button repeatedly until the door opened. “Tomorrow!” Then she got in and pressed to close the doors.
“Didn’t you see what I wrote you?” Mayu asked. She did stop when she reached me but I wondered for a moment, cornered between her and the elevator closed doors. “Tell me you were just drunk and not falling for that brat.”
“Don’t call her a brat.” I smiled imagining Mayu’s face when I told her the whole misunderstanding. “She’s actually trying to help me, and I’m almost sure she thinks she’s making me realize my sexuality.” Ari too would be surprised if that were really what she had thought.
Mayu flicked my forehead. “Read my messages before that smile becomes even sillier. I can’t believe we need to have this conversation. That brat…”
“I already asked you not to call her that. She was being super nice, just a tiny bit misguided.”
“And you too, don’t make excuses for her shit and enable her just like Aasa did.”
I raised my shoulders. “She is a cute little thing, I can’t blame Aasa. Also, Aasa is taking very good care of my kakyuusei back in the Snow Troupe, why wouldn’t I return the favor?” I rested my back against the closest wall. “This was just a joke and a misunderstanding. It’s all been cleared up, and we’re back to normal.”
“I saw you kissing her.”
“The tongue was fake.”
“How long has it been since you dated anyone? At least since you’ve transferred, right?”
I cackled. “Let’s leave it like that so it hurts less. But I’m not after Ari, even if I think she might be lesbian or bi? I don’t know.”
“I suspect you forgot what flirting is at this point. Read my damn messages. Besides, that brat won’t be anything, she doesn’t date troupe members.”
I raised an eyebrow.
To be continued…
Anita, 21/08/2020
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